Stresssss

So I'm stressed as I'll get out!  My first day back at school hadn't really gone according to plan.

First, I seem to have a bit of a head cold so my head is pounding and my nose is a faucet! Second, the girls were super cranky yesterday and hadn't napped but once for maybe and hour.  So that made for a little bit of a rough start at getting them down for bed time.  
Even when they did fall asleep finally they woke up at 2:30 am, insisting they were hungry!  They have not done this in such a long time I and I was so exhausted from this head cold I was in tears thinking, "Why tonight?! Why now?" (sad, pathetic..maybe)  I just did not understand why they were so upset so early and waking up like this, especially the night/morning before my classes!

Then waking up at 6:30am to find out again, they thought it was time to cry and cry and..cry!  While I rush to get dressed, take some cold medicine, and get out the door I realize how crazy I am to be doing a full load of classes while being a twin mom.  The entire way to school I just couldn't help thinking how much work my first class already has in store (47 projects), I was nervous to see how much work the other classes will require!  

Also while in the back of my mind, even though I completely trust who I'm leaving the girls with!  I love her to death, I'm just so nervous to not be around them all day!  Going from them being my life to, having to forget them for 8 hours and think of only studying, books, projects...my brain just wanted to implode! 

So far I've had a little time to relax while going over this weeks lessons for my first class (computer graphic applications).  Also my 2nd class(Astronomy) was so fun and I loved the teacher. Not to mention I just simply love astronomy and if it weren't for getting pregnant with 2 I would be in the air force going into Astro Physics.  Maybe I can minor..but such is life and I'm moving forward.

I just cannot get over not having the wee ones laughing and giggling in the corner while I work on something.  So crazy how you become attached and cannot seem to function correctly.  BUT it is the first day and I'm sure things will get easier as we all get into the swing of things...if we ever get into the swing of things.  

So while taking a break and reading some blog updates I came upon this post from a friend, here.  Now I'm not one to post about God, religion, or anything of that matter..not because I don't have beliefs, cause I do, I just don't speak very openly about them to most people as I've seen in the past it's caused conflict.  BUT none the less here is quote she posted and I found hitting very close to home:

True, enduring happiness, with the accompanying strength, courage, and capacity to overcome the greatest difficulties, will come as you center your life in Jesus Christ. Obedience to His teachings provides a secure ascent in the journey of life. That takes effort. While there is no guarantee of overnight results, there is the assurance that, in the Lord’s time, solutions will come, peace will prevail, and happiness will be yours.

The challenges you face, the growth experiences you encounter, are intended to be temporary scenes played out on the stage of a life of continuing peace and happiness. Sadness, heartache, and disappointment are events in life. It is not intended that they be the substance of life. I do not minimize how hard some of these events can be. When the lesson you are to learn is very important, trials can extend over a long period of time, but they should not be allowed to become the confining focus of everything you do. Your life can and should be wondrously rewarding. It is your understanding and application of the laws of God that will give your life glorious purpose as you ascend and conquer the difficulties of life. That perspective keeps challenges confined to their proper place—stepping-stones to further growth and attainment.

The Lord is intent on your personal growth and development. Your progress is accelerated when you willingly allow Him to lead you through every growth experience you encounter, whether you welcome the experience or not. Trust in the Lord. Ask to be led by the Spirit to know His will. Be willing to accept it. You will then qualify for the greatest happiness and the heights of attainment from this mortal experience.

--Richard G. Scott

It made me think about how everything that has happened in the last week (or my entire life for that matter) has simply been a challenge that I need to overcome and when I do I will have grown and become a stronger person.  It just simply comes down to trusting and having faith that I can do it and will do it!  No matter how hard it may be or seem, it is entirely possible. 

I also am feeling very lucky to be married to the man I am today.  He instantly sent me a message telling me he loved me and he knew I would do great!  Not to worry about the girls and just focus on school.  <3  

Hopefully getting through these next 2 classes goes smoothly and by the end of the day I can go home, relax, nap maybe, and get some homework done.