(M)CIO

If none of you know what that stands for, I'm going to tell ya. 

It stands for one of the most difficult things a mom has to do sometimes, in my personal opinion.

Cry it out

I added the M in the title because it felt more like a mommy CIO. =p

No mom wants to make her child do this, we always hope that the day comes where we no longer have to comfort them  to sleep and they just simply understand, it's time to go to the dreamers world.

Well, last night we had to make that unfortunate journey.  

The whole situation in itself seemed ironic.  

The twins generally sleep from 7pm-6am.  Getting up to eat at 6 then if I'm lucky back down for another hour or so.  I suppose last night they thought that the time from 7:40pm-2:30am was a cat nap.  Because at 2:30 they both thought it was time to get up for the day.  No they weren't hungry, no they didn't want help getting back to sleep, they just wanted to be up.  After several failed attempts to comfort pat them to sleep, re-wrap them in hopes of giving the hint it's still WAY too early.  Even resorting to simply sitting in the rocker humming for 45 minutes to see if it would bore them to sleep..I felt like a failure!

Call me a mean mommy, but I refused to feed them at 3am.  Coming up on 9months old our doctor has even told us that at this point they shouldn't be needing a midnight bottle and if they wake up it's generally because they are unable to get back down into the deep sleep.  I figured this was pretty accurate after reading those sleep training books and so on.  Not to mention they weren't making "hungry" noises or cries.  So when 4am rolled around and they still were whining-not crying- and not sleeping.  I was tired, upset, and at a loss.  SO, I tried it.  I closed the door went back to bed and turned down the baby monitor to where it was a dull background noise.

First off, they did not like me leaving the room!  Within moments it was screams of almost terror coming from the other room!  Oh boy did I feel horrible, I lie there in bed fighting myself to go in there and tell them I'm sorry and let them know I'm right there.  

I didn't, I stood my ground and lay there, listening to their cries for their mom.  Here is the ironic part, I couldn't sleep.  Not hearing them in the other room insisting they needed me when I knew they were OK.  So, we all cried a little bit.  Sad, I know...what can I say I feel vulnerable now that I'm a mum.  It's a whole new world where I feel like I'm making small mistakes every step of the way while hoping we make larger leaps to fix those little mix-ups.  

Anyway, back on track.  4:50am came on the clock.  The cries had begun to die down to simply one of the gremlins-Kenzington our normally quiet but once her buttons are pushed she lets you know-and even hers were quieter.  Eventually, it was all quiet.  I waited 10 minutes before I ventured into the lion pit hoping they weren't doing their "Ill pretend I'm asleep then start talking again soon as they are all settled in".  

They weren't, both were snuggled up to their lovies and breathing gently.  It was a success, 50 minutes of cries and they were done and ready to sleep again.  I felt relief, it worked, although it was longer than I had ever wished to have to listen to them cry.  

I know many moms choose not to do this method, I am generally one of those.  Something inside of you just goes off and makes you anxious the entire time they cry, making you feel like you have to do something NOW!   While there are others who have told us "Oh let them cry all night if they have to".  That I could never do.

To be honest I hope to never have to do that again, call me a pansy but I just cannot handle hearing them so upset.  30 minutes has always been a limit for me and them crying.  I really hope it was a fluke and they just had a little mix up in their day, it's never happened like that before.  

Here's what I've learned:

I've become a true softy with the bearing of children.

They have me wrapped around their little fingers.

CIO, worked and seemingly with no damage since they both squealed with joy when they saw me this morning.

Dads are too good at sleeping through the chaos. 

Last but not least- we all need a vacation. Hahaha.  ;)